Sports
Noted jock rockers Coldplay to play Super Bowl halftime show
by Tyler Munro
December 4, 2015
Football fans are about as excited as you'd think.
Another year, another Super Bowl announcement that’s sure to anger the dedicated millions of fantasy football fans watching the big game.
In the past, word that artists like Bruno Mars, Katy Perry, and the Black Eyed Peas would play the big game’s halftime show had fans in a rage. This year, it’s noted jock rockers Coldplay whose sensitive brand of marching band sop-rock has football fans asking “but seriously, can’t we just get Bon Jovi or something?”
“We are so excited and honoured and thrilled to be playing the halftime show,” said Coldplay’s Chris Martin, who comes from a country that calls soccer football. “It’s going to be wonderful and I hope we see you there.”
Calling it “the greatest moment in our band’s life,” Martin added that while they’re nervous about their setlist, they’re going to give the performance “everything they have.” And true to tradition, the band’s artistic director — yes, Coldplay has an artistic director — says to expect a special guest.
While that special guest is probably just going to be, like, Gwenyth Paltrow or something, it can’t possibly be worse than when the Black Eyed Peas played a bizarre disco tribute to the Tron franchise.
Pepsi, who are sponsoring the 50th Super Bowl’s big show, are planning to track the band’s progress in preparing for what might be their biggest gig ever — last year’s game drew an average audience of over 114 million viewers, meaning Chris Martin better start brainstorming what he’s going to write on his hands.
