Music
You can take Riff Raff to prom for the low price of $28,000
by Mark Teo
January 15, 2015
“U ARE NOW A LEGEND IN YOUR HIGH SCHOOL.”
Take it from me, high-school students: Being “too punk” is a terrible reason to miss prom. A better reason to miss prom, albeit a slighty—and only slightly—less embarrassing reason, is because you couldn’t find a date. Still, lonely 18 year olds, fret not. Now, you can rent a prom date, and in our eyes, he’s a keeper—former From Gs to Gents star Riff Raff can be your arm candy for the low, low price of $28,000.
Plus, you’re not just renting the Neon Icon’s time. In fact, when you drop the $28k, the rapper born as Horst Christian Simco will throw in plenty of perks: You’ll roll up in his Lambo, and, in Jody Highroller’s words, “U ARE NOW A LEGEND IN YOUR HIGH SCHOOL.” He’ll post freestyle videos from the event. And you’ll end up in a penthouse suite with the notorious virgin.
Here’s the offer Riff Raff posted on Instagram.
Though it isn’t mentioned in his post, hopefully there’ll be a chance to meet the adorable Jody Husky, pictured below. Plus, it’s only, like, $28,000. What else would you buy with that cash? A Mazda Miata?
