Tech
We played every game for Punktendo, the punk-rock Nintendo system
by Greg Bouchard
November 11, 2014
Last week, the animator, hacker, and all-around creative troublemaker Jeff Hong wowed the Internet with the release of Punktendo, an online Nintendo emulator with punk rock versions of classic games. What does that even mean, you ask? It means he replaced the characters in games like Super Mario Bros. and Mega Man with iconic punk musicians, created amazing mashup cover art, and made it all available to play for free from the comfort of your own home or at your office desk while hiding from your boss. Super Mario Bros. became Super Mikey Erg!, with the Ergs! frontman taking over for Mario, Mega Man became DAN ZIG with Danzig’s Glenn Danzig, Kung Fu turned into Milo-Fu with Milo from The Descendants, Popeye just turned gay, and so on.
This is just the most recent cultural icon-busting project from Hong, who is also the man behind Disney Unhappily Ever After, which recasts well known Disney characters in deliciously dark and cynical situations. Hong says he learned how to change the sprites in video games by using online resources, and can do it in a couple days now.
Since the the idea is so bizarre and has left a lot of readers wondering what Punktendo games are really like, we rolled up our sleeves and took on the important task of playing and ranking every game Hong has put out so far. Here’s what we thought.
1. DAN ZIG
Imagine Mega Man starring Glenn Danzig, the founder lead singer of legendary metal band Danzig and founder of the Misfits. The always charismatic and over-the-top rocker brings an endearing regular-guy look to the game, embarks on his journey to save the world wearing black leather pants and no shirt. You go, Glenn!
2. Gay Popeye
The beauty of this game, which replaces characters from the Popeye Arcade Game with gay stereotypes, is that it fills in the blanks we already saw. It's like if someone made a Gay Bert and Ernie movie. All the sailors and large, merry bearded men just look happier now. And so are we.
3. Racist Alley
This could've been awful, but it's actually done so well that it almost becomes a biting piece of social commentary. Hogan's Alley, the game where you shoot bad guys and avoid hitting civilians, sees the civilian characters replaced with black teens and the locations replaced with Ferguson, MO, and Sanford, FL. After the initial WTF reaction, it actually gets you thinking.
4. Duckless Hunt
See? No ducks.
It's Duck Hunt with no ducks. That's all it is. Totally regular Duck Hunt, but - oops! - no ducks. Good for a laugh, but also oddly mind bending.
5. Super Mikey Erg!
Super Mario Bros., the most classic video game ever made, starring Mikey Erg from The Ergs! It's fun and it's neat, but there's no thing special happening unless you're a huge Ergs! fan.
6. Milo-Fu
Kung Fu starring Milo from The Descendants. Same general reaction as Super Mikey Erg!, though there is an extra element of fun seeing a punk rocker go nuts on a bunch of ninjas.
7. Masked Intruder Alley
This is the same as Racist Alley, but with members of Masked Intruder (M.I.) switched in. It's a cool concept but pales in comparison to the much more interesting Racist Alley.
8. Fat Mike\'s Golf
Honestly, this one is just sad. Watching Fat Mike from NOFX play golf is a bit too much like watching Fat Mike, now 47, slowly slip into retirement. We'd rather have seen Fat Mike's Punch Out, where he punches invasive fans in the face, as he did in real life recently.
