Music

Morrissey thinks Canadians are fashionably dead barbarians

by Mark Teo

Listen, we’ll be the first to admit that, as a bunch, Canadians are sartorially challenged. Montreal’s oft lauded for its style, but in reality, it’s largely characterized by overly distressed denim, eye-scorching hybrid shoes, and racecar-inspired outerwear. Vancouver’s spirit animal is the Vibram FiveFingers sport shoe. Calgary resembles a Fu Manchu album cover blended with a 1997-era rockabilly show. Toronto’s the town Joe Fresh built—and just as interesting as its sexless, constipated Upper Canadian roots. Halifax looks like a quilt knitted by your armless grandmother. And… we could go on.

So it’s no surprise that Morrissey—a dapper gent—thinks we’re, in his words, “fashionably dead.” But today, in reaction to the annual East Coast seal hunt, the Smiths singer condemned both our style andour ethics. Namely, he criticized how Canadians were ineffective at stopping an industry that, he says, has been condemned world-over.

The sharp-tongued “Everyday is Like Sunday” singer, however, did have a few nice things to say about Canadians. “Canada is a beautiful country, and the people of Canada are good people,” Morrissey wrote in an open letter to True To You, a fansite. “But good people are often ineffectual. Internationally, Canada’s sorry image is due entirely to its seal slaughter—which is greedy and barbaric, and it is dismaying to witness such ignorance in 2014. Sound reason tells us that only those of the thinnest intellect wear animal fur, and because the Canadian government are concerned with animals only economically, killing baby seals with lightning brutality is now Canada’s primary global image.

“Until this annual massacre is abolished, Canada itself is regrettably fashionably dead.”

His stance shouldn’t come as a surprise; after all, dude wrote the Smiths’ iconic Meat is Murder.

In Canada, the seal hunt has often been portrayed as inhumane. Animal rights protestors have been effective at stopping the trade of seal products to China, notes The Province, and much of Europe and Russia has withdrawn from the Canadian seal trade. As the market has dried up, only a reported 15 boats are taking part in 2014’s seal hunt in Newfoundland and Labrador.

“From a market perspective, the seal hunt is very much over,” said Rebecca Aldsworth, executive director of the Humane Society International in Canada, told CTV. “Markets around the world have closed … It’s an industry that’s limping along on credit and subsidies.”

Fisheries minister Gail Shea, however, says there’s been a lot of misinformation about the industry—something that, she surely believes, in perpetrated by Moz.

“They have been spreading misinformation about the Canadian seal hunt and Canadian seal products for as long as I’ve been in this position,” Shea told CTV. “It’s grossly unfair. We’ve done a lot of work in ensuring that our Canadian seal hunt is humane.

“I believe there’s great opportunity in the sealing industry.”

Morrissey—a guy who, after barbecue smoke wafted onstage at an outdoor concern, once proclaimed that “I can smell burning flesh, and hope to God it’s human”—disagrees. And in his letter, he addresses Shea specifically, calling the minister hypocritical.

“Gail Shea, the federal Fisheries Minister for Canada, says that baby seals are “killed humanely”, and explains how the baby seals are shot by high-powered rifles,” he wrote. “Is this a death that Gail Shea would wish for herself? Would it make her happy to be shot by a high-powered rifle?”

Here’s Morrissey’s statement in its entirety.

The seal hunt in Canada is struggling to make a start this year due to almost no markets, and China especially is refusing to sell Canadian seal meat.Thank you, China!

China has stated that “animal rights protests” are the reason why they have dropped Canada’s custom.

The annual East Coast seal hunt/kill started Monday – against a strong wave of trade and court challenges. Europe continues its ban on seal products.

Gail Shea, the federal Fisheries Minister for Canada, says that baby seals are “killed humanely”, and explains how the baby seals are shot by high-powered rifles. Is this a death that Gail Shea would wish for herself? Would it make her happy to be shot by a high-powered rifle? If she considers such butchery to be so “humane”, why doesn’t she place herself amongst the tens of thousands of grey-coated harp seals that will be slaughtered within the next few weeks? She could then test the humane aspect of having her head blown off for herself. Onlythencould she be thought to speak with any authority on the subject.

Canada is a beautiful country, and the people of Canada are good people. But good people are often ineffectual. Internationally, Canada’s sorry image is due entirely to its seal slaughter – which is greedy and barbaric, and it is dismaying to witness such ignorance in 2014. Sound reason tells us that only those of the thinnest intellect wear animal fur, and because the Canadian government are concerned with animals only economically, killing baby seals with lightning brutality is now Canada’s primary global image. Until this annual massacre is abolished, Canada itself is regrettably fashionably dead.