Music

Justin Bieber's drug urine test videos to be released

by Tyler Munro

Because this is the world we live in, a Florida judge has ruled that we’ll soon be able to see video footage of Justin Bieber’s drug urine tests from his DUI arrest in January. According to The Associated Press, multiple media outlets requested that the footage be released under the state’s public record laws, but don’t worry—they’ll be censored.

“Mr. Bieber’s right to privacy is paramount,” said Judge William Altfied, clearly lying. “He has not lost his right to privacy, and that is what is important here.”

The official word is that we’ll be spared seeing Justin Bieber’s doodle, since the clips will either be censored or “shot from an angle that is too far to discern what is going on.”

Like him or not, there’s pretty clearly a line being crossed here. What do we stand to gain from seeing a drunk teen sensation whizzing in a cup? About as much as we did from watching him (below) drunkenly stumble trying to walk the line; about as much as we did watching him do push-ups in his holding cell. What we stand to gain here is yet another punch-line. How many clips of this kid urinating do we really need to see? Wasn’t this one enough?

It’s not to excuse his actions, since all of this stems from a drunk driving incident earlier this year, but at this point shouldn’t we be trying to help, not humiliate, the guy? He’s fucking up royally, but at 20, who hasn’t?

Update: The video is out now at TMZ. Head there to watch it if you’re so inclined.