Twitter has become unbelievably important to a modern day artist’s career, as they can use it to connect with fans, keep the masses excited for upcoming releases or simply spark pointless beefs with their contemporaries. But what about for the artists of the past who really have no reason to Tweet? We found six pop stars you would never expect to see on the social network, who actually (and obviously) run their own feeds, and who… well, no one would miss too much if they closed their accounts.

Right Said Fred (@TheFreds)

The twin brothers that comprise Right Said Fred might be too sexy for their shirts, but are evidently not too sexy for hashtags and @ replies. Though they have also proven too sexy for lasting commercial success, this hasn’t stopped them from keeping up with their small but loyal fanbase, updating them on everything from which TV shows they’re watching to which movies they’re watching.


Lisa Gail Allred (@LisaGail8)

Is Lisa Gail Allred truly a pop star? Likely not, but the Rebecca Black-esque viral success of her embarrassingly bad music video “3 Second Rule” has made her one of the most watched musical artists of the year. So in an attempt to extend her 15 minutes of fame into a robust 20, Allred has taken to Twitter. And guess what? She’s Christian as hell!

Yes, with God’s help, you too can be cruelly mocked by millions.

Tito Jackson (@TitoJackson5)

As the brother of Michael Jackson and a member of the Jackson 5, Tito was a reliable punchline throughout much of the 1990s, but his total irrelevance hasn’t stopped him from accumulating almost 80,000 followers. Tito rewards their loyalty with scads of garbage Tweets, often logging on to Twitter just to announce that he has successfully logged onto Twitter.

John Oates of Hall and Oates (@JohnOates)

Unlike that total cock Hall, Oates has embraced Twitter as a way to interact with the remaining fans who are still willing to admit they enjoy the music of Hall and Oates. Well, let’s see what he was up to this weekend.

Poppa T is in da house! I bet Oates and Tito spent an hour debating whether Tweetdeck is better than the official Twitter app.

Fred Schneider (@fredschneider3)

The B-52s frontman with the highly-imitable voice still performs regularly with the group, and given their energetic live shows, you’d think following him would be a hoot and one-half hoot. Instead, he uses Twitter as a forum for his deep hatred of Republicans, who he dubs “Ratpublicans.”

However, Schneider does have his rare moments of sage reflection.

His Tweets are only tolerable if you talk-sing them out loud, “Rock Lobster” style. A PIMPLE IS A DIMPLE! A PIMPLE IS A DIMPLE!

Ringo Starr (@ringostarrmusic)

Think about it: who would reasonably have a more interesting Twitter account than Ringo Starr? He was in the most successful band of all time and must have a million stories to tell. Turns out, not so much, or at all. Ringo’s fond of (accidentally?) posting inane Twitpics of fascinating sights like horses:

Crunch dried snacks:

And light switches:

Not to mention his near constant struggles with spotty Wi-Fi:


He also has the tendency to send out what are seemingly direct messages to his entire follower base. But he’s 72. He probably thought he was making a phone call.

Tweets like these could be why, despite being a member of the most beloved band in existence, Ringo only has 32,000 followers. Money can’t buy you RTs.