Music

POP UNCULTURED: A roundup of weird happenings in music for the week ending September 30

by Anne T. Donahue

Since it’s impossible to address the total madness of the music industry in only five days, Pop Uncultured saves some of the week’s strangest stories for Friday afternoon. Enjoy?

Susan Boyle covered Depeche Mode [FULL STORY]

I’m not going to make fun of Susan Boyle or her cover of Depeche Mode because you know what? It is not the worst thing I’ve ever heard in my life. But I will say that regardless of how not-bad this version of that song is, there’s someone who might sing it just a bit better:

Weird Al has finally released a video for “Polka Face”

And after the controversy, the blog posts and the snippets of song posted here and there, the gift of laughter is finally upon us once more. Because at the end of the day, don’t we all just want to watch animated accordions, beer and sausages and try to identify each and every song he manages to squeeze into almost five minutes? (Correct answer: yes.)

You can buy Wu-Tang shirts at the Gap now [FULL STORY]

And they say that you can’t buy street cred.

Beyonce can’t stand the smell of Jay-Z now that she’s pregnant

Jay-Z and B’s recent collaboration is causing 99 problems now that Beyonce hates the smell of her husband’s fragrance, and her nose is reportedly all “doot doot doot.” But while we still don’t know whether he’s Changed Clothes or taken his friends’ recommendations to brush some Dirt Off [His] Shoulder, we can only assume that it’s making for quite a Hard Knock Life. [via MTV]

Of course Taylor Swift released a perfume and made a trailer for it [FULL STORY]

And if you take this advertisement seriously (which I do), upon application of the fragrance, you will find yourself wearing a ruffled dress wandering alone through a forest… only to be startled by a middle-aged ghost who seemingly haunts an abandoned carousel. You’ve been warned.

Courtney Love is writing a memoir and we’re all probably going to read it [FULL STORY]

Guaranteed to “set the record straight,” this literary gem is due out for release next fall. Let’s hope it’s nothing exactly like her former Twitter account.

Sly Stone is living out of his van… but it’s his choice, okay? [FULL STORY]

Earlier this week, news broke that former funk legend Sly Stone was living out of his van due to both financial and legal troubles. However, writer Roger Friedman has recently revealed that the singer opts for a mobile environment because “he’s too paranoid to come inside.” While I’m sure Friedman’s telling the truth, I can’t help but assume that Stone has also been cursed by a few simple words:

Korn‘s going dubstep!

In an attempt to “stay current” and to “keep on top of what’s going on”, Korn are releasing an album on December 5 that will consist only of songs worked on by dubstep producers. Their motto? ‘Because if you weren’t already sure that dubstep’s over, we’re going to help prove it.’ [via NME]

Rihanna got told off by an Irish farmer

Rihanna caused quite a stir when filming a video sans wardrobe in Ireland this week, but while some gentlemen would embrace the sight of the singer gone topless, Billboard reports that a Bangor-based farmer got off his tractor, confronted Rihanna and told her to put on some clothes. “I wish no ill will against Rihanna and her friends,” the farmer said. “Perhaps they could acquaint themselves with a greater God.” Guess he’s never heard of this guy:

Justin Bieber got a date idea from Adam Sandler

Remember the scene in Mr. Deeds where Adam Sandler takes Winona Ryder to Madison Square Gardens on a date to watch a movie or something and it’s really romantic and become a major pop culture reference? (…Anyone? Hello? Bueller?) Well Bieber does. And so for a romantic night out with his lady-love, little boy wonder rented out L.A.’s Staple Center for a private screening of Titanic which we should all probably applaud because at least it’s not The Notebook. [via Vulture]