Music

A bat shit on Kelly Osbourne's head

by Dan MacRae

After decades of peace between bats and the Osbourne clan, a new act of violence has torn their fragile peace accord asunder.

Kelly Osbourne told Instagram it was clearly a case of mistaken identity when a collection of bats (the titular creature from the Lou Diamond Phillips film Bats) attacked her and shit in her hair. Like all people that have had feces in their hair, Kelly insists that the revenge poo is tied to the actions of her dad. After all, her pops Ozzy is notorious for biting the head off a bat in 1982, assuming it was a toy.

The visual evidence is as compelling as it is just super duper gross. It’s almost a twisted Highlights for Children challenge: Find the bat shit in Kelly’s purple hair!

Here’s how Kelly summed up the bat attack in the accompanying caption:

The former MTV staple followed up that disgusting pic with something a bit sweeter and bit less guano-y, albeit complete with a caption calling out her dad’s past misdeeds.

The more things change, the more they stay the same or whatever it is you’re supposed to say about Kelly Osbourne having a dollop of shit in her hair. Here’s hoping the Osbournes do not launch a counterstrike on the planet’s bat population and that this can all be worked out. It’s not the first time Ozzy was attacked by bats, btw. (And no, things won’t be “even” if Kelly poops on a bat. It doesn’t work that way.)

[h/t NME]