Music

Kid rants at the Rolling Stones in this hilariously angry letter from 1966

by Tyler Munro

The Rolling Stones road manager made a remark some 66 years ago when Mick Jagger, Keith Richard and Charlie Watts went on vacation to Fiji and got what he felt was a less than special reception.

But rather than brush it off, one incredibly angry kid wrote a letter, and what followed was a hilariously angry rant about how the Rolling Stones smell like pigs and how this kid’s entire school hates them.

Necessary? No. But that’s why it’s funny. Read the transcript below, via Letters of Note.

To the Rolling Stones,

Just wanted you to know, me and my friends with nearly the whole school, HATE you. Because you don’t look like men, you are nothing but ANIMALS, and smell like them too. We know also that you are DIRTY and STINK. You probably never have baths which is typical of English pigs like you. I hope that you hurry up and go away from clean Fiji, because we don’t want you here, you PIGS. We HATE HATE HATE you. I am speaking on behalf of 640 kids who all HATE you. So go and pick some pigsty in the slums of smelly England and have your MISERABLE holiday there. Your stupid road manager was upset about no-one greeting you, because we HATE you. Your road manager needs a POKE. If you dare to set foot in Suva, me and my friends will tell some of the MEN of Fiji (Suva), to come and SPIT on you, and go to the TOILET on you. Thats all your worth. So do what I said, and GET OUT, we HATE you.

It’s worth noting that while the trip inspired the use of a sitar on “Paint It Black,” the country never quite forgave them for their manger’s misgivings. 40 years later, Keith Richards had to be hospitalized after he cracked his head open after falling from a tree while vacationing in Fiji.