Pop Hunter is re-capping the grotesque display of culture that is American Idol all season. Here’s what you need to know from this week’s round, which aired March 14th 2012 and March 15th, 2012.

This week on Idol, contestants were tasked with singing a song that was released the year they were born. I thought this was kind of a surprising theme to go with, given that the contestants were born between 1983 and 1996, an era that birthed some of the worst music of all time. Don’t get me wrong — I love 80s music, and cheesy 90s pop has a special place in my heart. I just wasn’t sure how these songs would play with Idol’s predominantly younger audience. Do any 12 year-olds love Michael Bolton?

This week, the Top 12 contestants performed. Well, not so fast. The pack has almost thinned to a point where it’s reasonable to write about every performance (maybe next week?), and Jermaine Jones did us a favour by getting his gigantic self fired from the show.

Jones hid his criminal past from American Idol producers, which forced them to get rid of the gentle giant rather unceremoniously.

I SAID LATES, Gentle Giant. His voice was super goofy sounding, anyway.

Also, does it strike anyone else as odd that the American Idol executive producers are both British?

Here are the song choices for each contestant, as well as the year they were born:

Phillip Phillips “Hard to Handle” (Otis Redding) 1990
Jessica Sanchez “Turn the Beat Around” (Vicki Sue Robinson) 1995
Heejun Han “Right Here Waiting” (Richard Marx) 1989
Elise Testone “Let’s Stay Together” (Al Green) 1983
Deandre Brackensick “Endless Love” (Lionel Richie & Diana Ross) 1994
Shannon Magrane “One Sweet Day” (Mariah Carey & Boyz II Men) 1995
Colton Dixon “Broken Heart” (White Lion) 1991
Erika Van Pelt “Heaven” (Bryan Adams) 1985
Skylar Laine “Love Sneakin’ Up on You” (Bonnie Raitt)
Joshua Ledet “When a Man Loves a Woman” (Percy Sledge)
Hollie Cavanagh “The Power of Love” (Jennifer Rush) 1993

To my eye, there are at least 3 songs that weren’t originally written in the year the contestants were born, they’re actually covering popular cover versions. Very sneaky, American Idol. You’ve found a loophole, and managed to dodge all the bad music released in the late 80s and early 90s.

Okay, back to business. While we’re slicing & dicing this Top 12, let’s get rid of one of the blonde girls. We’re operating at a 33.3% (4 out of 12!) blonde girl ratio right now. We’re way over budget.

Sixteen year-old Shannon Magrane has been extremely overrated with the judges this season, and I say if we have to lose one blondie, it’s gotta be her. This version of “One Sweet Day” by Mariah Carey is far beyond what Shannon is capable of as a vocalist. So long, and thanks for all the botched key changes.

Let’s end this thing on a good note, and feature the only jaw-droppingly awesome performance from this week, courtesy of Pop Hunter fav Josh Ledet.

So, we lose Jermaine Jones, and Shannon Magrane, and we finally have a top 10. As I mentioned earlier, we’re finally at the stage where it’s reasonable for me to write (and for you to read) briefly about every performance. So next week you can look forward to 10 succinct quips on why everyone except Joshua Ledet sucks.