POP UNCULTURED: A roundup of weird happenings in music for the week ending August 5, 2011

by Anne T. Donahue

August 5, 2011






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Since it’s impossible to address the total madness of the music industry in only five days, Pop Uncultured saves some of the week’s strangest stories for Friday afternoon. Enjoy?

Lady Gaga apparently wants to play Amy Winehouse in a biopic [FULL STORY]

There is no other way to report that Lady Gaga apparently wants to play Amy Winehouse in a movie other than to say that Lady Gaga apparently wants to play Amy Winehouse in a movie.

DMX is recording a new album because obviously he’s a better rapper than all of the other rappers

All day, every day is the amount of time DMX is putting into his upcoming album, because according to Billboard, he’s “bringing hip-hop back where it’s supposed to be” after “too many whack rappers” have made the genre “too corny.” And amen/alleluia, because heaven forbid there’s no more of this:

Drake and Nicki Minaj to provide voices for the new Ice Age movie [FULL STORY]

2012 just got a lot more interesting because our generation’s The Lion King is about to be a 3D animation spectacular. With voices from Drake to Nicki to Wanda Sykes, we can only hope that Jay-Z and Kanye will eventually follow suit with my imagination’s upcoming favourite, Ice Age 6: There’s Snow on My Throne – prequel to Ice Age 5.5: Brush This Snow Off My Shoulder.

The Beastie Boys are now action figures you can actually buy

Christmas comes early, all. And with no sarcasm whatsoever, let’s toast to the fact that you can now actually buy Beastie Boys action figures for $750 because really, what else were you going to spend that junk change on anyway? [Rolling Stone]

Chris Brown + Justin Bieber = it’s a rap! [FULL STORY]

It happened! Despite warnings from everyone, Justin Bieber and Chris Brown have collaborated to release a track that’s actually not that bad considering Biebs now calls himself “Shawty Mane,” “[spitting] tracks like Patrick Swayze”. (Who, we may recall, did not actually spit tracks.) Anyway:

What do you think, Patrick Swayze?

Beyonce wants to be like Gwyneth Paltrow

“She is what I strive to be one day,” Beyonce told Harper’s Bazaar UK. “You go to her house and she makes you feel like you never want to go home.” Stockholm Syndrome. Not just a city in Sweden anymore.

Adam Levine of Maroon 5 to produce a karaoke bar sitcom

Get your LOL face on, everyone: Billboard reports that Adam Levine is going to produce a “karaoke bar sitcom” that will be directed by Jake Kasden of Bad Teacher. What’s even better is that Levine met the show’s writer at a karaoke bar, so clearly this series is going to be so hilarious we probably won’t even know what to do with ourselves. Just don’t forget to watch this:


Alice Cooper‘s launching his own theme park ride

In what can only be explained as “too awesome to be true – BUT IT IS”, Alice Cooper is developing a “spooky maze” at Universal Studios just in time for Halloween. Reportedly boasting guillotines, spiders, electronic chairs and snakes, songs from the singer’s upcoming Welcome 2 My Nightmare will also be incorporated, leaving just enough room for you to make a joke about it. [via NME]

Miley Cyrus to star in and produce a God-themed comedy

Revolving a “broken promise to God”, Billboard says that Miley Cyrus and her mother are about to make “God-themed” comedies a thing, which, I think we can all agree should only ever look like this:

Puddle of Mudd cover Rolling Stones

You are so, so infinitely welcome. [via NME]

Gimme Shelter by puddleofmudd. Uploaded with BandPage by RootMusic

Tags: Music, News, Alice Cooper, Amy Winehouse, Beastie Boys, Beyonce, Chris Brown, gwyneth paltrow, Justin Bieber, lady gaga, Maroon 5, Miley Cyrus, Nicki Minaj, Puddle of Mudd, Rolling Stones






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