Music

POP UNCULTURED: A roundup of weird happenings in music for the week

by Anne T. Donahue

Since it’s impossible to address the total madness of the music industry in only five days, Pop Uncultured saves some of the week’s strangest stories for Friday afternoon. Enjoy?

Blink 182 have released their first new song in six years and we all feel really old now [FULL STORY]

So no, this doesn’t exactly count as a “weird happening” in music, but forget technicalities for a minute and remember that THIS IS BLINK 182 GODDAMN IT. Put on your Dickies pants, your DC shoes and head to your local mall to loiter because our youths are no longer a distant, melodramatic memory.

But on second thought:

The Black Eyed Peas broke up (and the world may have flash mobbed in thanksgiving)

So last week you may recall learning that the posse disowned “My Humps” and then allegedly abused a chimpanzee, and now they’ve taken an “indefinite hiatus” – which, I can only assume is because of everything just mentioned. That, and fist-pumping at a bar just isn’t what it used to be. [via The Huffington Post]

There is a thing called Wizard Rock and it’s exactly as glorious as you think [FULL STORY]

Well, I could go into detail about what Wizard Rock actually is, or I could use this quote to better articulate it: “A lot of my songs are from my own perspective just as a fan. Songs about living in a world full of Muggles and just wishing I’d gone to Hogwarts instead of college.” Yikes. Bet this is their slogan:

Checkmate.

Rebecca Black is releasing a single on Monday so beware, everyone

First of all, the single is called “My Moment.” Second of all, it was written by the same guy who wrote Bieber‘s “Never Say Never.” I’m not sure how to say this guys, but we might actually not hate it as much as a) we want to and b) please see ‘a’. [via NME]

If you go to a Morrissey show, he may search you for meat [FULL STORY]

Because that’s what he did to a slew of fans recently who were checked to “make sure [they] weren’t carrying any meat products inside” the venue. Also, Morrissey was bitten by a dog this week. And while the two are (likely) not related whatsoever, let’s assume that for humour’s sake they are completely, and that’ll show Moz not to confiscate those bacon-flavoured puppy treats ever again.

Slash has written a song for Disney

Alright, so first and foremost, here it is:

Secondly, adding to Phineas And Ferb‘s credibility (though I thought that base was covered after Julia Roberts named her twins) is Slash in cartoon-form, where NME reports that he’ll be turned into an animated character to promote Phineas And Ferb: The Movie – Across The 2nd Dimension in all of his cartoon-y glory. Also, never forget:

Rated “G”. For “GREAT WORK, DUDE.”

The guy that plays Draco Malfoy is a rapper now [FULL STORY]

So Harry Potter opened today, and while you can hope this is just a form of Wizard Rock, it turns out Draco Malfoy (Tom Felton) is actually just going to rap now. (Note: rap isn’t Wizard Rock.) You can listen to it below, and remember that if you can’t form words and only worried facial expressions, that’s entirely okay and you’re not alone.

:/

Joss Stone was flattered after almost being kidnapped

And I mean, who can blame her, right? Out of anyone in the world, it was Joss Stone who was going to get mighty familiar with swords and some crazies. New level of fame, guys. Let’s get Costner up in here. [via NME]

Billy Ray Cyrus had a “vision” of Miley bringing hope into the world (?)

And Music-News says that is why he named her “Destiny Hope”. Okay, sure. But one could also argue that it was to make up for taking hope away so many years ago:

Forever.

Cee-Lo Green wants to date Pipa Middleton

It’s important for you to know that Cee-Lo isn’t just about “screwing around anymore,” and is planning to “aim for a duchess or something” because “what’s her name? Pippa? Piper? Yeah, I’ve got to go for Pippa, man. She’s gorgeous. I like her.” NEW COUPLE ALERT! Kate, what do you think?

LMAO, Kate!