Music

15 songs to soothe self-diagnosed Ebola

by Aaron Zorgel

Ebola mania is currently sweeping North America, proving that we as white people have zero chill when it comes to co-opting African culture. You probably just logged on to Web MD for a quick self-diagnosis, and yep, you’ve definitely got it. There are five stages of grief you’re going to experience: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and finally, playlist construction. Aaron Zorgel is here to help you indulge your hypochondria with some choice cuts about being sick.

Van Halen – Somebody Get Me A Doctor
Mudhoney – Touch Me I’m Sick
Foreigner – Hot Blooded
Bruce Springsteen – The Fever
Replacements – Take Me Down To The Hospital
Amanda Palmer – Runs In The Family feat. Ben Folds
Matchbox 20 – Unwell
Disturbed – Down With The Sickness
The Smiths – Still Ill
Ne-Yo – So Sick
Wax Mannequin – Tell The Doctor
Green Day – Brain Stew
Shadow – Ebola In Town
Slayer – Epidemic
Fugazi – Give Me The Cure