Style

Dress down, feel good

by Mish Way

The first guy I ever really loved was a drifter. A total lone wolf. We split up because he wanted to move to France and “explore”. (He ended up getting scouted eating a cheeseburger outside a McDonald’s and becoming a runway model for high-end couture designers.) The Drifter taught me many things, but one thing he was really excellent at was minimalism. His fantasy was a big, open loft with white walls, a table, L-shaped couch, and nothing else. The Drifter did not hold onto anything. I, on the other hand, still have clothes in my closet with tags and thrift store items that I haven’t been able to fit in since high school. I have a hard time letting go.

As a musician, when you commit to a full touring schedule (because, as we all know, touring is the only way to make money as a musician, unless, of course, you are The Knife) you commit to a whole new way of living. I’m not talking about the way superstars like Anthony Kiedis or Madonna go on tour. Madonna can bring a leather sofa, a freezer full of pink birthday cakes, and 100 dildos along with her if she wants to. I’m talking indie-punk tours. You commit to the small suitcase life. You have to learn minimalism and love every minute of it.

When I first started touring, I brought way too much with me. All of the members of my band did. We were green. On White Lung’s first real tour, our bass player brought a fucking back scrubber to use in the shower. A back scrubber! I never brought a sleeping bag or my own towel (both necessities on a punk tour), but jamming three extra dresses and a pair of boots seemed like a must-do. I had no clue and I was self-conscious.

In those first years of touring I would lug around piles of clothing with me and for what? I always ended up wearing the same few outfits all tour long while the ridiculous dresses, stockings and extra shoes stayed crumpled at the bottom of my suitcase. It took me way too long to realize that when you are in a new city every night, you can wear the same thing over and over and no one cares. In fact, you could do it in the same city every night and no one would give a shit. As long as you aren’t admitting an offensive odor, you will be OK. Cat Power wore the same thing on stage every night during her Sun tour. Pick one standard and stick with it for the shows.

I also do not have a regular job, in so far as I don’t have to go to an office every day. When I am home, I work from my kitchen table, which means most days I barely get dressed. I don’t have to worry about how I look.

Clothing used to really make me feel uncomfortable and stress me out because I was intimidated by my femininity. Over time, I learned that I should not have to suppress my femininity to be taken seriously in the punk scene. I used to really butch myself up because I felt judged by my girlishness. I wanted to reject caring about my hair, make-up, and clothing because I felt like it was something that would make me seem vapid.

Finally, I said fuck it. For me, femininity is not so much about a rainbow of expensive outfits, but one solid pair of high-waisted pants, one dumpy old crop top, chunky shoes and a lot of jewelry. Make-up, jewelry and enough bras and underwear to last a year. I think of myself as this Christmas tree I have to decorate every morning and I find a spark of joy in it. You find what makes you feel good and live by those rules.

I learned from The Drifter boyfriend of mine and years of touring that it doesn’t take a giant closet of expensive clothes to have true style. All it takes is creativity and the confidence to not give a shit what anyone else thinks.